We can't help but observe that moms have their own niche vocabulary, or language. And when you mash it up with all things royal, a delicious Momarchy slanguage is born. Here are some of our favorite terms.


Plucky British-inspired word for mom. Favored by cute, fit, modern celeb moms like Gwynyth Paltrow.

Usage: Mum, could I have a biscuit with my juice, please?

Bless her heart:

All-purpose phrase used to soften the blow in an oh-so passive-aggressive manner whilst doling out an insult.

Usage: She thought the ACT was a local theater group, not a college entrance exam. Bless her heart.


Charming word for fight or altercation that positions it as not so tawdry.

Usage: The kids got into a bit of a kerfuffle over whether to watch Good Luck Charlie or Wizards of Waverly Place. Even though Junior's cornea was torn, everything is fine now.


Not good, unreliable, tricky or downscale.

Usage: I can't believe they held Junior's birthday party at that dodgy Bonanza. It was filthy and the toddlers really didn't take to the steak and potato meal.


Toned down way of expressing enthusiasm or excitement.

Usage: I'm not too keen on spinach but I'll have a go of it.

Living in the town of Buggin:

The place Junior and Junior Miss dwell right before pushing mom right over the edge.

Usage: Sally is so Living in the town of Buggin' what with that sass-mouth of hers today.


Delightful and old-fashioned, Downton Abbey-style word to describe the checkbook register, or even the overall household budget (which many tech-savvy moms probably have captured on Quickbooks).

Usage: Hmm, I'm not sure if we can go on Spring Break this year, but let me have a peek at the ledger and we'll see . . .

Spot-on, or Brilliant:

Brit-inspired way to describe your child or girlfriend's achievement at even the smallest thing. In an awkward or brief moment, can also be useful catch-all word to throw out to provide a measure of enthusiasm.

Usage: Nine out of 10 on your spelling quiz? Brilliant, Sally! -or- When Jane said the PTA prez didn't know her head from her arse I thought to myself, spot on. -or- The waiter brings a second basket of bread and you exclaim, "Brilliant!!"


Romantic and aspirational spin on the word vacation. Caution: can sometimes confuse entrenched Americans.

Usage: My holiday was just lovely last week . . .  just lovely! To which the response might be, er that's wonderful, but wait, there was a holiday last week?


Amazed, flabbergasted.

Usage: I was completely gobsmacked that, after that ginormous fight, the kids played together without killing each other.


A painful, inconvenient or just dreary situation.

Usage: Oh, the bother of trying on bikinis with February-white skin!

Straight away:


Usage: Children, when your lovely mother asks you to fetch a mojito, you must do so straight away.

Sort out:

Figure out.

Usage: The kids didn't understand the homework at first but I got them all sorted out.


Parts, sections or pieces.

Usage: I explained the plot of Fifty Shades of Grey to the other moms without all the naughty bits. There really wasn't much to tell.

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